Will my LAP-BAND affect my marriage or other relationships? In a way, yes it will. First it starts with affecting you. You will change your personal relationship with food. You’ll look at eating differently and will modify habits that led you to an unhealthy weight or continued the cycle of unhealthy weight. During this personal change you might need support from those around you. You will need to be strong enough to say, “Sorry I prefer not to eat that… but I can eat this.” or “you know I love peanut butter m&m’s, but I am trying not to have them on a regular basis anymore, Can we avoid having them in the house?”
For example: if your spouse wanted to go back to school and needed to leave work for that, you both would sit down and have a conversation about it. What will they need? What would you need? What would they need help with? What will that change look like? Why do they need to go back to school? During that conversation you both express ways to successfully achieve your mutual goals and understand why this is happening. The same should be true for bariatric surgery.
Learning to vocalize your new lifestyle needs is very important and listening to how your new needs affects others around you, is just as important. Finding the balance between these needs will assist in the success of your weight loss surgery and your relationships. Because you both play very important roles in this upcoming chapter of your lives you should keep each other informed as much as possible. During the preparation for LAP-BAND surgery, communicate the future changes you will need to make and how you will need help. Your family and friends should be your support system, so they need to understand the areas that you may need help in and how they can help. You may choose to include them in your doctor visits, your dietary visits, group support and online learning materials. It may ease their fears of changes as well.
Be prepared. We often see hormone levels change and adjust during the first few weeks/months post LAP-BAND surgery, expecting this can help you and your spouse navigate through the emotional waters ahead. As you embark in your weight loss journey and lifestyle changes, other issues may arise. Be ready to talk about them and to listen to the feedback from your family and/or spouse. Every relationship is unique, so utilize what you’ve learned from each other to adjust to this new norm. Couples or individual therapy can serve as a tool deal with changes as well. .
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Your upcoming bariatric band journey will change things for everyone in your life, and that’s not a bad thing. Remember to focus on your health and what changes you need to make. Be mindful and kind to those around you, they’re trying to help. If you would like to learn more about Dr. McEwen and his Community Surgery Center Hamilton team please visit our Facebook page or call our office at 317-621-2500.
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